Category Archives: Relationships

Seeking Help is the Best Decision I Ever Made


My journey through the grief process was not a lot of fun but it allowed me to move toward a new beginning.  If this major loss did not occur I would probably have not chosen my new career path.  As it is said, “If God did not believe I could handle this, he maybe would not have allowed this to happen to me.”  He only gives you challenges that you have the ability to overcome.

This has allowed me to apply my most treasured skills that were part of my prior career to my new career path.  What has mattered most in my business and personal life is to apply my interpersonal and relationship talents toward helping others through their personal times of crisis.  This is what I treasure most in life…….helping others.

During my personal grief process it was revealed to me that a career that I had never considered before was something that was made for me…….to become a professional grief coach so I could help others work through the major loss that happened to them because of the loss of a loved one to breast cancer.  My personal experience with this type of loss can be directly applied to the situations I am involved with others facing a similar challenge.

In addition, I was introduced to Aurora Winter and herGrief   CoachAcademyso I would be provided with the tools needed to deal with my clients who are facing a similar loss.  As it is said, “Everything happens for a reason.”  And I believe this directly applies to the changes that have occurred in my life. 

“Success has nothing to do with

what you gain in life or accomplish for yourself.

It’s what you do for others.”

~ Danny Thomas

                                                                                     


“Trust in the LORD with all your heart,

And do not lean on your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He will make your paths straight.” 

Proverbs 3:5-6

 

 

In Remembrance of My Wife, Gretchen


Below is a message I gave at the funeral of my wife, Gretchen:

I have been blessed to know Gretchen for 45 years and been married to her for 40 years.  Gretchen and I had many good times together, but just as other couples, there were some rough spots along the way.   I can easily say that some of those speed bumps were my fault but we moved down the path of life and became closer because of these obstacles thrown in our way. 

Gretchen was a great mother to our two sons, Erik and Mark, and developed a close relationship to Lindsey and Aneta, who we consider as the two daughters we never had.  During our boys growing years and beyond, she devoted her whole heart to molding Erik and Mark into great young men.  Gretchen was good at providing a loving home for the three of us.  She was also able to instill the right amount of discipline and guidance at the same time.   

She was not without her faults as all of us can say about ourselves.  As the saying goes, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.  But she managed to work her way through these and still provide a loving home to always come back to.  Another thing that many of you have heard me say is that Gretchen is one of the most stubborn people I have ever known.  She was the type of person who said what was on her mind and that is one of the traits that we all loved about her. 

As most of you know, Gretchen was a strong woman.  How else would she have been able to make it through her two encounters with breast cancer 3 to 4 years ago?  It was this vicious disease that ultimately cut her time short on this earth. 

It will be difficult to continue without Gretchen but I have a great family and network of friends who stand ready to support Erik, Mark and me.  Another source of strength will be my reinvigorated faith.  This will help not only with the loss of Gretchen but also will bring me peace and an ability to navigate the other challenges that will come in my life. 

Gretchen, I love you and always will.  Please save me a place for when my time comes and we can be together again.  I love you baby.

 

Sometimes It Is Best To Just Swallow Your Pride


Every now and then we should reassess our relationship with our spouse.  There are a lot of distractions that can enter into a relationship.  It is up to us to try and forget about our pride so we can continue to make this relationship work.  Following are  the lyrics to a great Brooks and Dunn song , Husbands and Wives, expresses this best.

Two broken hearts lonely looking houses
Where nobody lives
Two people each having so much pride inside
Neither side forgivesThe angry words spoken in haste
Such a waste of two lives
It’s my belief pride is the cheif cause in the decline
Of the number of husbands and wives

A woman and a man
A man and a woman
Some can and some cant and some cant

Two broken hearts lonely looking houses
Where nobody lives
Two people each having so much pride inside
Neither side forgives

The angry words spoken in haste
Such a waste of two lives
It’s my belief pride is the cheif cause in the decline
Of the number of husbands and wives

It’s my belief pride is the cheif cause in the decline
Of the number of husbands and wives



Remember to keep everything in perspective.  You should focus on balancing the following aspects of your lives: family, friends, career, health, faith and your outside interests.  One of the most important aspects of a well-rounded life is to continue to work on your relationship with your life partner.  This is not always easy and I am guilty of forgeting about this at times.  All you can do is forget about the past and proceed to make things right in the future.

If you enjoyed this article, please feel free to share it on Facebook, Twitter and you other social media web sites.  You can find more posts on my Blog at www.helpingothersachieve.com.

You may contact me at koeneman@comcast.net or call 630-986-9008.